My New System!
You guys that play as much as I do know what I'm talking about, those ugly days in which the count is even and negligible and you are flat-betting minimums and yet somehow, incredibly enough slam out 3 blackjacks in a row, achieve ridiculously sweet splits combined with double downs and hit beautifully and then an hour later when the shoe is in your favor, the 6 deck shoe is 3 decks in, there are 17 extra face cards so you bet it up only to have the dealer slam non-stop 20, 21 or blackjack while you get 12 through 16 every hand and of course break every single hand. This happens...the nature of the beast. You shrug it off and weather it out. This is why bankroll size is all important, those nasty flucuations that are often discussed.
Worry no more! Short bankroll? Having attained all the components such as dead on count, side tracking, clump tracking, masterful bankroll management and these things taking you years to perfect not coming through? Worry no longer!!! Use Tarzan's new "monkey monkey" system!! Forget all those years of learning and training to be the best because of the times when it all swung around to kick you in the butt and the dealer got non-stop natural 20's while you hit 13 and broke every hand while you were betting it up big.
My new "monkey monkey" system is easy and foolproof! It involves carrying a small electromagnet with a directed field, forming a magnetic field around the dealer's breasts. This system works it's best magic during the vernal equinox and when you have the opportunity to utilize the services of a 7 piece mariachi band to provide resonance and pitch conducive to purporting the right conditions. When the mariachi band plays B flat at the point you are called upon to give a hand signal, scream "Monkey! Monkey!" loud and pat yourself on your left butt cheek. You will be guaranteed to win! Ever been sitting at a table and be grinding and stagnating basically 2-3 betting units ahead after an hour and a half and then have some oriental walk up midshoe out of nowhere, slap down big fat bucks and miraculously win after screaming "Monkey! Monkey!" and you realize they banged out in 3 minutes what you often take hours to make with no count, no nothing? THEY bought my system...and...look about because there is obviously a 7 piece mariachi band playing off to the left someplace. I provide a sombrero hat with my system at no extra charge.
Moral of the story: Counting has actually COST me money at times(because of the crazy although quite infrequent situations I noted at the beginning of this)...and progressions just don't work. The big picture and the long haul and "keeping your eye on the ball" are the only way to go though. Vigilance, determination and common sense will keep you afloat longer than any system or trying to add something to basic counting. More ELABORATE counting beyond simple high/low, clump tracking/shuffle tracking---now THERE's something quite interesting!!!! I have been wondering about this lately, reading about it. I have often thought about watching when that group of 10 aces that all came out in about 15 cards pulled from the shoe and watching where they go during the shuffle, training to see where they get mixed into. I'm sure this is in another portion of this blog/message thing someplace and I'd really like to know more about this or hear from anyone that could be considered expert at it.