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Rob McGarvey

Well-Known Member
User Profile: alienated

Messages Posted ( CardCounter.Com Main Message Board ): 47
Most Recent Post: 7/20/03 11:21:18 p.m.

Handles: alienated, Ted Forrester.

Ages: alienated is 30ish, Ted is pushing 60.

Educations: alienated, an F student, was expelled from school at 15 and left home to join the Young Anarchists. However, they expelled him soon after when his growing interest in shuffles led him to argue, distasteful though it was for him, that determinism was an important concept for professional gamblers. Ted, a C student with good connections, eventually received his Masters degree, having been enrolled in one of the university's less reputable PhD programs. (Provisions were in place such that the authors of exceptionally poor doctoral theses could, rather than flunking, be awarded Masters, on the proviso that their rich parents refrained from pursuing protracted law suits against the university.)

Jobs: alienated remains proudly unemployed and fiercely unemployable. He uses his dole cheques as tiolet paper and chain smokes cheap, nasty cigarettes - especially during negative counts at the non-smoking tables. Ted, in his student days, was an apologist for the capitalist state and big business before selling out to classical Marxian political economy, there being an unexpected opening at the university. Eventually, having secured his full pension, he denounced the capitalist education system and turned to high stakes roulette and craps, using his pension as his first session bankroll. (It was only many years later that he was introduced to advantage play, and dissuaded of the benefits of 'money management'.)

Interests: alienated likes keying aces and pairs, especially against shuffle machines. Ted likes living the high life.
 
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alienated

Well-Known Member
Guilt has finally overcome me and I feel obliged to confess that Ted did not appreciate me sharing his personal details with my friends at CC.com in the way that I did. As a Gentleman he felt violated and betrayed. Normally I wouldn't have done it to him - it's not in my nature - but annoyance at his pomposity finally got the better of me.

I was hard at work at the time analyzing Shuffle Master's latest Mega Master shuffle machine employed at the local casino monopoly, and Ted hadn't done a hand's turn all day. When finally I was ready to go out and make some money, he appeared in fancy dress from behind his personal craps table to announce his intention to attend yet another Old Boys' reunion rather than the special 6:5 blackjack promotion on the new 11 deck game at our local - 4/11 pen, H17, D12 (hard) only, split only once (per shoe), NDAS, ENHC, lose all ties, and 17s lose to dealer busts - for the modern game, in other words, quite appealing. However, Ted, as so often seemed to be the case, was too intent on gallavanting round town like the social butterfly he thinks he is to exploit this latest marvellous opportunity.

Aggrieved at having to shoulder the entire keying responsibilities, as well as best-third cutting duties, NRS calculations, Thorp Ultimate for betting, Griffin's almost complete strategy tables for playing decisions, plus the insurance count, and knowing full well that Ted would still expect one half of all profits, plus interest, I consoled myself with the knowledge that the special 6:5 blackjack payoff would make all the hard work worthwhile, especially with the abundance of aces and tens to be found in 11 decks, even shorted ones, which are the custom at our local.

It was only when my optimism over the promotional opportunity proved to be ill founded that my anger finally boiled over into rage, expressed in the first instance through an anarchic array of bodily contortions, agonized convulsions and spray of expletives - mostly directed at Shuffle Master and its malfunctioning Mega Master which had motivated a sorry series of impromptu and erratic human shuffles - and in the second instance, through my arrival at home hellbent on destruction and the typing of Ted's personal details into my user profile at CC.com.

I know now, of course, that this was wrong. That no matter how many Mega Master malfunctions I was forced to endure and regardless of Ted's many foibles, I should have refrained from releasing his sensitive information on the internet.

So now I seek to make amends. Ted would like it known that, apart from occasional private games at home, he never has and never will play craps; that playing Roulette is a Gentlemanly pastime of which he would still partake were it not for the technical glitches that afflicted his device; that his PhD thesis (revised down to Master's) was not of an appalling standard, but rather that of a Gentleman who puts in about the right amount of effort and refrains from vulgar excess; that he never once read, spoke or imagined a classical Marxian thought and that this was just scurrilous rumor-mongering on my part to suggest otherwise; and, lastly, and most crucially, Ted is adament that he has never at any time, or in any place, engaged in 'money management': he has an 'accountant' to do that.
 
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The Mayor

Well-Known Member
Re: Is ZG out???

Haven't heard or seen ZG. He got 18 months in November of 2002, which he tried to reduce to 12 months by going through some drug rehab courses. If that's the case, the best he will do is November 2003.
 
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alienated

Well-Known Member
Just fooling around

I'm afraid this is just a case of (my weak) humor not translating very well over the internet. Rob was just quoting my "user profile", which was another of my poor attempts at humor. In the finest traditions of blackjack anonymity my user profiles are intended to create as false an impression of myself as possible. Of course, I'm really a 45 year old businessman in a pin stripe suit. ;-) In my response to Rob I was just trying to stretch the joke a little further. But like most of my 'humorous' efforts, it seems to have fallen rather flat. ;-) Some of my earlier posts have fallen to a similar fate, but I never seem to learn. I once wrote a post entitled "A Marxian Theory of Capitalist Teaming", or some such, over at bjmath.com, which was received with polite silence. I put it down to the math being insufficiently technical to warrant comment.

I would have jumped in and cleared this matter up earlier, but I wasn't sure if the other posts in this thread were also intended as jokes, and didn't want to appear like the square businessman I really am by being seen to take a joke seriously!

Regards all,
alienated/Ted
 
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learning to count

Well-Known Member
Re: Just fooling around

I wondered about the post my self at first but then after reading some of your work/posts I figured you were being intellectually humorous. The profile is strange but does give an insite to your humor and intelligence. Keep up the excellent work/posts. See ya on Green Chip!
 
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The Mayor

Well-Known Member
how could it possibly be ...

When I read your post, it was OTTCO (obvious to the casual observer) that your brain had once again split in two, and you were having a conversation with and against yourself. I quite enjoyed it, and encourage more such dialogs between your alter egos, which clearly respect each other about as much as Micheal Moore and George Bush.

Next topic, is it better to be left or right handed?

--Mayor
 
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