Boy, did I clear a table!

2

21forme

Well-Known Member
I'm sitting at the table, and the player next to me notices a few red spots on my arm - I got a few nasty insect bites while out in the garden earlier in the week.
He asks, "What's that?" pointing at my arm.
I say "Oh, I was tested for TB a few days ago. I guess that means it's positive, doesn't it? Then I coughed a few times...
 
Doofus

Doofus

Well-Known Member
When I've been wanting some heads-up action and the ploppies are all clogging up the table, I've successfully cleared tables by: 1) fiendishly splitting 10s several times with small bets out on the table against any card the dealer might have; and 2) pulling out a huge stogie, lighting up, and shouting to the waitress to bring me whiskey and keep bringing them until I fall off my chair.

Neither of these strategies has ever failed to make even the stupidest ploppy pick up stakes and move to another table.
 
Ferretnparrot

Ferretnparrot

Well-Known Member
Ill never forget one time i split tens on two consecutive hands, at a full table, after hand one two peopel pushed there chips to color in
as i moved to split on the very next hand the whole table groaned and moaned.
when the hand was over, all three remaining players pushed their chips in simultaniously leaving just me at the table, the count was still high and i got all the cards to myself it was badass.

then again i recale another time being dealt two hands of 20, the splitting and resplitting them into a total of 7 hands and the guy next to me encouraged me to keep splitting them. so i dont think it always works perhaps you shoudl first probe into their expressions by suggesting it, then go directly against them sayign no and do it anyways to piss them off further.

"would it anger you guys if i split these tens? ok ima do it anyways sry for asking"
 
S

shadroch

Well-Known Member
Staying on hard totals less than ten works just as well,and is cheaper. After you stay,figure out (out loud) what you would have had,had you hit,and continue to let everyone know what they would have had,as well.If the dealer busts because of you,hi-five the oldest,most well dressed woman at the table.If the dealer wins,be sure to blame her instead.
 
ihate17

ihate17

Well-Known Member
How to clear yourself out of the casino

21forme said:
I'm sitting at the table, and the player next to me notices a few red spots on my arm - I got a few nasty insect bites while out in the garden earlier in the week.
He asks, "What's that?" pointing at my arm.
I say "Oh, I was tested for TB a few days ago. I guess that means it's positive, doesn't it? Then I coughed a few times...
Click to expand...
Kidding aside, joking with strangers about have a communical disease in a crowded, poorly air ventalated casino, should get you removed almost as quickly as your table mates left.
I would 86 your butt but let you back in with a note from your doctor saying you are clear of TB but infected with a kinky type of uncurable sense of humor.
Similar to the guy who is worse by joking he has a bomb on an airplane.

Better to lay a wicked fart. It may be a weapon of mass destruction but has not been classified as such by the authorites yet (legislation is probably pending where Callipygian plays).

ihate17
 
zengrifter

zengrifter

Banned
Ferretnparrot said:
then again i recale another time being dealt two hands of 20, the splitting and resplitting them into a total of 7 hands and the guy next to me encouraged me to keep splitting them. so i dont think it always works
Click to expand...
That was me. See ZGI for mor 10-split advice. zg
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top